Thursday, October 28, 2010

adoption hopes and dreams

i started this blog as a way for my family to keep up with us.  at the time, ben and i had just started trying to get pregnant, so i knew that we would soon have information that everyone wanted to know.  :)  i figured that i would blog about our baby all of the time, for family to see, just like i do now.

when i started this blog, we had also just made the decision that we were going to adopt as soon as God allowed.  we started down the loooooong road toward adoption, with the first step being research, and lots of prayer.  if you have read my previous posts about adoption, you know that i have always wanted to adopt.  when God heavily placed adoption on our hearts in 2008, i was ready to fill out papers right then.  i wanted to adopt asap.  asap would have meant through the russia program, since their age requirement for adoptive parents is 25.  china was/is our first choice, and their age requirement is 30, so russia it was. 

i didn't have much faith that i would get pregnant.  i don't know why, but satan really had me believing that it wasn't going to happen.  i thought that maybe God had me so wrapped up with adoption because i wasn't going to be able to get pregnant.  i think i would have been sad at first, but would have really had a peace about only being able to grow our family through adoption.

we tried to get pregnant for a while, and i was like, "see! this just isn't meant to be."  but as always, God had bigger and better plans for us, and now austin is pretty much the center of our universe.  :)

we decided to hold on to our china dream, and hold out for the age requirement of 30.  both spouses have to be 30, so we can't submit our paperwork until i'm 29 and 1/2 (and ben will already be 30).

i know many people have been wondering (or talking behind our backs? :)) if we will still adopt since we now have a child of our own, and the answer is of course!  we hope to adopt as many children as we can provide financially for, and as many as God opens the doors for.  (i would personally love to also adopt from guatemala, since i consider that "home.")

people ask all of the time... "why adoption??"  "if you can have a baby, why would you adopt one?"  "why adopt, because it's so expensive?"  "why adopt, because you have to fill out so much paperwork, and wait a long time?"  i have so many responses to those questions, so i will make a list.  (moms love to make lists, right?)  :)
  1. why not??  
  2. we will do what God tells us to do, and we don't need your approval.  however, we do hope that you would be encouraging and understanding, even if you don't agree with our decision.
  3. the bible clearly tells us in james 1:27 that our job is to care for orphans and widows. 
  4. i have grown up with many of my close friends' families adopting.
  5. i see nothing unnatural about it.  actually, i see it as very natural, since us adopting a child mirrors God adopting us as His children.
  6. we strongly believe that God will provide the money.  we won't let that worry hinder us.
  7. our love for our children, and our desire to do God's will is greater than hours of paperwork, and years of waiting for a referral.
our plan right now is to apply for the china program, and we are praying about whether or not we should apply for the special needs program.  i have recently felt led to accept a child with the special need of a heart defect.  this does not mean that any of our plans are written in stone.  we are open to whatever God leads us to do.  we may never adopt from china.  we may never adopt at all.  we have no idea what the future holds for us and for our family, but we are praying that His plan for our family does include adoption, and we are trusting that He will open the right doors at the right time for that to happen.

i want to challenge YOU to get involved some way with orphan or widow ministry.  there are so many needs out there, and you may simply be called to just pray for them.  if you are interested in orphan care, you can check out this website, or this one for some great information.

i hope that this post doesn't come across as me being defensive, or ranting about this.  i want everyone to know where we stand, and what our plans are, in case you are wondering, or have been asking.  if you have any questions, or questions about adoption or orphan care, please contact me (click contact me in the left sidebar).

p.s.  the ticker at the bottom of my blog that says "waiting for our child to come home" is counting up from the time that we agreed that we felt called to adopt.  it has been 2 years, 1 month, and 3 days since we made that decision (i think i guesstimated the day).  i thought it would be neat to see how much time went by "waiting."  when he or she is home with us, we can say, "we waited x years for this!"


Laycee said...

How wonderful it is that you and Ben are doing this! There are so many children out there without a home or family. I think this is amazing and your following Gods will for your life. I have wondered about the ticker at the end of your blog and that is a great idea. I have always heard an adopted child grows in your heart. I always thought that was special. I would love to adopt one day and have considered China. I may be a bit partial to girls. :) You just may be the person who helps us out one day! Who knows...

Veronica said...

I think this is awesome Ashia! Not all of us area called to adopt, but I love the heart of those who are. My very best friend is adopted and her story always touches me. I pray that the Lord will open the door for you guys to adopt when the time is right. Have you heard/read other adoption blogs where they use the adoption agency "All God's Children?" Seems I've read several blogs who have used that agency although I'm thinking that it's primarily used to adopt children from Africa.

I love your heart! :)

Morgan said...

So precious and so true!!

Amy said...

I have followed your blog for awhile now, but just tonight I stumbled across your adoption link on your sidebar. It was such a divine appointment for me to come here today. My hubby and I have two kiddos and had recently started the process to adopt through the foster care system! Last week, I found out I was pregnant and it's been an emotional roller coaster as I process it all. Your words and experience have really been relevant to me-- even 3 1/2 years after this post! :) We are going forward with the foster care license because we really feel it's God calling us to fulfill his command to care for orphans and widows. We'll see where God takes us! (Why is it so scary to say that sometime?!?)